Listen My Children, and Ye Shall Hear....

...have you ever done something and then immediately regretted it? Made a decision and then wanted to take it back?

Have you ever done this after thinking it over so very, very carefully?

You took all of the information, weighed the pros and cons, went over the list at least a hundred times... You assessed all of the variables, the constants - what could happen, what the probabilities were. You did your research, hedged your bets, and made a decision.

And then it doesn't matter how certain you were. How sure you were it was the right decision. How safe you felt in your decision.

There's that sickening feeling that you just failed miserably....

Maybe this is just me?

Research isn't the end. I can research until the waves grow sweet but.... Just because something FEELS right.... How do I know it is?

How do I choose when both sides make such plausible arguments?

One way is easier, makes more sense....

But does that make it right? 'Broad and easy is the way that leads to destruction'.... Maybe I'm deluding myself - taking the 'easy' and 'logical' road and it will be my downfall.

How can I tell?

Because at the same time, the second option is also so very, very simple. One is simple for everyone else, the other is reasonable to me. Both have the same source. Both have the same goal.

....how do I choose? How can I know what's right - what's true?

Black and white.... HA!

Life REALLY isn't that simple....

Ah....

What am I working on....

Joy.

This is another one of those posts where it's just like - really??  Did you HAVE to ask that??  *sighs*

I'll figure it out, of course.

Willem's Universe

This is the most current one. It's basically about this Russian crimelord and the family he gathers around him and the difference he makes in other people's lives.

This is an annoying story. It started out as a bloody short story and has....exploded. I have learnt Russian, German, culture, law, tradition....

I've explored myself through this story - used it to carry me up through some of my darkest moments. I've used it to explain myself to others.

I worry so much that it's terribly inaccurate....

I deal with a lot of logistical and medical issues as well as mental and moral and....I do admit that I do take inspiration from movies I've seen and those are notoriously unreliable. I try to do my research but... Yeah. no.

I might actually be able to salvage this story - to use it.

Part of the Mafia Universe.

 Willem, Stasya, Isobel, German, Adolf, Anton, Liya, Samuel, David, Elsa, Gerald, Charline, Lei Shun, Xinyi...

Where do I even BEGIN with characters??

The thing about this story is that it WAS supposed to be a short story. So...it jumps all over the place.

Willem is the main main character, but I very often switch point of views. But the whole thing is a study of him.

And did you know there are actually RULES for being in Russian orgainised crime??  It explains SO much about television shows.....

Adam's Universe

Also known as the Detective/Assassin story.

This is....sort of the same thing as Willem's, but the polar opposite. Instead of the Russian mafia winning, it's American law enforcement winning against the mob in New York.

It's about a lot of facades - masks being put up. Where Willem's is about masks being torn down - Adam's is about them being put up.

This is the story about brothers. About...David and Jonathan, basically. Except...really, really not.

It gets rather dark and was an excersise in 'misleading the reader' but....I love the story and the messages within.

*grins* And I adored the research necessary.

I mean, I love research for anything but.... Poisons??  How much fun!!

Part of the Mafia Universe.

 The main characters are: Adam and Jason. One is a Jew, the other a Christian. One is manipulative and dark - the other straightshooting. One rich, one poor. One an orphan, the other with a large family.

There's also Scarlett in the story, a very dear character who's sort of just...sprung up on the side.

This story literally came completely from a dream. The pivotal scenes were all from a dream.

A very, very, very dark dream....

But the characters!! I love writing them. Writing Adam's and Jason's interactions.... Polar opposites in so many ways and yet that helps them fit better.

My favourite scene is probably when Adam confesses to being Jack the Ripper (basically) to point out to another detective that the other DOESN'T know everything and isn't perfect.

World War II Story

...I leave it to you to guess the inspiration for this story. *rolls eyes*

This is actually a really old story - I've only come back to it because I've found a way around the endless research i would need to be content with this story.

It started back when I realised that people on the losing side of a war were still PEOPLE - they weren't all Hitlers or Stalins or....Mao Zhe Tungs. They were people with family and hopes and dreams.

The story takes one main character from both England and German and...follows them.

I doubt I can do justice to the theme but...  I'll try.

Part of the Mafia Universe.

Ernst is the German soldier. Stephan is the British solider.

The most..interesting? Dangerous? Part about this story is Ernst's sister: Thea. She can't work. Why? Because she's physically weak and not all there mentally - although she's not completely retarded. Just enough to make hiring her not worth it. She also has dark brown slightly curly hair and brown eyes.

.....notice a problem??

SHE'S IN THE MIDDLE OF NAZI GERMANY AND I BASICALLY JUST MADE HER THE PERFECT CANDIDATE FOR A CAMP!!

*groans*

Yeah. So.

I have no idea if she survives and it's worrying me.....

Stone Angels

This story is....so very, very dear to my heart.

Basically: it's about this soldier that leads his comrades in revolt against the very corrupt leadership - but since there is only one army, he is killing his brothers and sisters, literally. He wins, but because of his genetics and training - he really loses, having to do exactly what he fought to avoid doing.

This is definitely a fantasy story. While the Mafia Universe is dystopia crossed over with reality/historical fiction, Stone Angels is completely fantasy with genetic memory, immortals, angels, sword fighting, kings, impossible biological feats....

But it's a terribly dear story. One I very much look forward to.

It's more of....brothers against brothers. Moreso than the others where it's 'brothers against the world'.

 Resmar is the best character. Nolas is the main character (although at this point I think Resmar is more so than Nolas....). The angels have wings. And can manifest swords out of themselves.

And are amazingly cool just on that level.

Funnily enough: Resmar was supposed to be the villain. The real total villain.

.....but...then I made his character (after I stabbed his character in the back - I've REALLY got to stop writing things backwards...) and loved him.

Why do I do this to myself??

Anthromorphic Universe

All I can say is that this storyline got out of hand incredibly quickly....

Suffice to say that Death and Life are the main characters, with their sisters Fate and Time.

And their four horsemen/angels War/Daniyel, Pestilence/Sariel, Famine/Grigori, and Death's horseman who is technically the angel of death (Azriel) and the Hell that follows him.

Like I said: it got out of hand.

Obviously, it covers themes of life and death and morals and principles and right and wrong. It explores some of the effects history has on itself, and how something seemingly bad like 'war' or 'death' can be very, very good.

Overall though? It explores family. Because Death, Life, Fate, Time - they're siblings. Their Horsemen are like....cousins sort of.

It's....really, really weird and I'm blaming it on my love for myths....

Also: I pull from a LOT of tradition in this story too - concerning angels and supernatural and whatnot - but it's...very, very, very fictional.  I just mix and match and make up everything so....

Dystopia Universe

...Except the story is about people that CAN'T talk. They're assigned numbers at birth, assigned jobs and lives, and have to buy words to speak.

And they're happy and content. It's not REALLY dystopia - more like....normal life. With a few major changes of course....

The stories deals a lot with tyranny and cultures and traditions - wrong versus right and what makes wrong and right.

I mean - not like murder versus donating to charity; that's obvious. I mean about saying a word you don't have - stealing it - to scream for help if you see someone being violated. I mean about choosing between the law and what IS morally right, and how much power authority can have.

And....The original story idea wasn't mine - I was given it by a friend who let me discuss possibilities for the world for a little bit.

I really look forward to writing THIS story too.

I could summarise characters, but as they're all assigned numbers....

Not now.

1940's Mafia Noir

This is about dreams.

Every character has a dream - a goal they want. Some people reach that dream, some people kill their dream, some people die before reaching their dream.

Sometimes the dream is a fantasy - sometimes a nightmare. It's about loyalties and ties, and how history echoes forward.

It's a rather dark story, few happy endings....

I love it.

part of the Mafia Universe.

First, this quote fits just about every. single. story.

This story centres around four characters basically: Ian Dempsey, Sean Callahan, Elvira Thomas, and Sarah MacDonald.

The story is set in the Irish Mob in New York after the end of WWII. It's a lot more of...petty crime. Not really anything important. Not compared to the others.

This is the story that actually started the whole Mafia Universe, because I was watching a few Film Noir movies and got an idea. Studying the archtypes, I narrowed the idea down more and.... It took on a life of its own and grew.

Elvira was originally supposed to be the main character, the heroine. Sarah is the vilain. And...then Sean came along and as always....

Speaking of pairings - this is also a love story. Literally. It was based around the romance. Both Sarah and Elvira marry - one for love, one for selfish reasons that had nothing to do with love. Have fun figuring out which....

This sort of has a happy ending - depending on which character you're attatchted to the most.

Prohibition Era Story

 Part of the Mafia Universe

A story about...the prohibition. A convoluted story where morals are basically done away with and a man with strong morals gets dropped into a moral-less world.

And the struggles he faces and how he changes and stays the same.

Written as a study of Noir genre, of the character archtypes in that genre.

 The main characters are Virginia and Richard, with Nora playing a major role too.

This story is a lot more of strategy it seems than the other ones.

I mean, they all have strategy - just some stories gain it by accident and other by intent.

 Criminal Love Story

This story is....something I'm not entirely sure I'll use yet. It's part of the Mafia Universe but.....

Basically it's about a man and a woman that fall in love that should never have fallen in love and how they make it work although in so many ways they're broken and shattered and ruined and hopeless. They lift each other up even as they fall apart themselves and.....

And.....technically I can't write this yet. The idea largely isn't mine but....

Oh, I'd love to convert this one - I would love to.

Maybe....  *hopes*

Scots Wha Hae

An anthology of poetry written in the Scots dialect mostly. LIke Robert Burns and Robert Louis Stevenson wrote.

Basically: I might have accidentally have read Kidnapped first and then Burns and they were the reason I kept writing poetry? And I ADORE folk songs and ballads - love them.

So....a poetry book.

I almost have enough poems too actually....  This is probably the most likely to get done.

NOTE

I call them 'universes' because most of these aren't strictly a...novel. More of a collection of scenes that spans a person's LIFE, not just a section of it. Very often, the stories cover side characters and passing strangers - it's...not exactly limited to just a main character and few secondary characters and antagonist.

sub-note

 Also, I'm working on a LOT more than this, and these stories are a LOT more planned out than are written here but.....

The name I use for this site and the name I would publish under are both mostly pen names and I'd rather not get tangled up where I'm accused of plaigiarising myself. Or others. (But we're all writers and wouldn't DREAM of stealing ideas, right?)

(Unless it's Hannah Joy's Dust Mote story.

Someone go finish that.

Please.)